I Love You, Mother

"Mom, I love you", have you ever say this to your lovely mom? Have you always hug your mom? or "Mom, stop nagging"..... Mom is always mom, is the one who love you the most.

Well, my mom never hug me and say, "baby, is time to have lunch." or "Sweety, is time to sleep." And the way my mom wake me up is horrible. A peanut butter bottle with a big cockroach inside when you open your eyes (for those who scare of the cockroach) , what is your respond? I used to hate my mom, why don't treat me more soft. Since I seldom in touch with granny, I have no idea this behavior, actions are inherit from granny or it is my mom way of treating her daughter.

I don't really remember the sweet memories mom created with me, but those scary scene like holding the 'rotan', nagging 24 hours .... Besides, she never cook new foods, those foods i ate have been repeated for a decade, I try to complaint, "Cook yourself if you don't like it". My mom will never teach me how to cook, and I learned those cooking by myself ;)

Mommy like to keep old things, old newspaper, our toys, spoil fan, rice cooker, chair, and so on. Asked her the reason, she will said, one day will need it, but right now the house is like rubbish's mountain. She never let people to throw away her "rubbish", and we used to throw and at the end she was nagging for days even to week.

When I was growing up, due to the environment, financial, and the stress from study, I used to hate mom, and didn't talk with her for years. I was wondering why don't she understand me, my situation, she is a Mom, she has to have higher understanding since my age was 16-18. No, she were harsh and treat me the same way I treated her. At that time I was hopeful to leave the house and live at outside, live by myself. It became my goal, and I planned to continue my further study in Taiwan.

I went there, for the first few days I was feeling good, but days pass, I felt I lack of something, at first it was my financial, the expenses were out of my expectation. Besides, I miss my dogs and I guess my family as well, I couldn't even survive for 10 days, I came back after around one week. And the story start .....

While I was 16-19, I was trying to rebel to get the attention from my mom, and dad. And I was doing things that hurting myself to let them feel pain. I was addicted to social network and finding the new friends. And the time when I came back I met up with someone (my partner) from social network, it was another interesting story ;) My family were worry once they realized, and at the end my mom went to met him. 

Yes, he changed the relationship between mom and I. Since mom took the first step understand me, the way I judge her really different. She understand me, since that time onward, she try to help me, indirectly, appreciate mom <3.

She was a housewife before my dad retire, but she is working now. She has to work, fetch my sister, doing the housework, take care of my kids, and so on and so on..... She used to call me while I was study outside of the town, but every since she is working, she really seldom call me. I was somehow frustrated and feeling disappointment, mom can't even spend 10 minutes to talk with me?

Recently, I called her, and when she picked up just asked me if there is nothing important she has to go, becoz I will call her only when I need her to do something.  I was really ... speechless, and I was sad, I called when I want her to do something??? Unbelievable. I try to call her almost every week, and everytime she will rejected me by busy. Okay, fine no problem, if you said you are busy, but not telling me, I called you when I want you to do something, is really not fair.


Anyway, due to this things, I really feel unbalance, mentally, and I was quarrel with my love one. My heart was damn pain, seems like I'm having family but no one pay any attention on me. I can't take it, and I went back to mom (Call her in the morning), when I heard her voice I feel safe, and I feel good, I just keep crying, and cry ..... She asked me what happened ... and we talked about an hour. She was comforting me, and always send me the positive energy. I knew she doesn't feel good, I just wish to hug her. I called her almost every 2 hours, becoz I really need her, badly.

Mom is always mom, when you are happy you will share something with her, when you sad, you will did the same. And mom will be always there for you, no matter what is your age .....
Yes, she (especially Asian) might not hug or kiss you while comfort you, but you can feel her love, as I did. The moment is the best feeling that God created for human, mom love their children, always and always. Thank God I realized this at my age, and my mom birthday is coming soonnnnnn .....

Black Chicken (Silkie Chicken) & Hummus

Black Chicken ... have you ever eaten? It's call Silkie Chicken anyway ;)

And why it's Black? Any reason behind? No ....  Is just like human, we have fair or black skin color.

Silkie origin country is China, people usually stew with Ginseng or Chinese Herb and it contaion really high nutrition. Between, do you know how Silkie Chicken looks like?

Am look like this ;) 

  

Silkie Chicken is having calm characteristic which different with Normal Chicken. It's the PET as well, would you eat your pet???

I never make any Chinese with Herbal Cuisine, and I have no idea how to make it tho. I just bought one black chicken and use my own way to make it ;)

Yes, it looks like this, Without Skin :) Fully Black!!! My question came, when this thing in front of me, how to make it? Fried? Stem? Stew? or ??? I've refer to many video, but I have lack of lots of materials needed, and I don't think is logic to buy them since I don't use them often. So, I just decided to use whatever I have in my kitchen :) {Am alone, and no matter how is the taste I will finish it by myself ;) }

So, here is all my ingredient:
1) Gou Ji
2) Corn
3) Frozen Broccoli
4) Onion

I made it really simple, I fried the whole chicken and onion with about 2 tablespoon of Grapeseed Oil for about 5 minutes, add the water to cover the whole chicken, add the spices, Gou Ji, Corn and just leave it. After about 10 min, I add in the frozen broccoli and let it stew all together.

When the meat is cooked, you can off the frame and serve it.

Here is the final Delicious, Simple and yet Healthy Black Chicken, you can add on some chili as I did, but its completely optional.

If you are first time for this Silkie Chicken, you might find it interesting, the bone, the organ are completely Black that you can't never imagine. The taste was awesome and the meat was pretty sweet, I didn't add any sugar, is all natural sweet from the chicken itself.

Tips: Why Silkie Chicken compare with Normal Chicken??
1) Lesser in Fat and Cholesterol
2) High in Iron which really beneficial for woman
3) Contain Carnosine, which can act as anti aging.
4) Good for Kidney and anti cancer

Choose this Black Chicken if you have a choice, you won't be Regret <3 !!!

mama ...

Last night was been told my grandma sent in hospital again. It was the second time. She rejected to eat, and keep vomiting, mother told me. She is having Alzheimer, live like a kid now.
Mama like to treat us the hard milo while we were (with my sister) kid. When the milo not fresh, it will became pretty hard, and mama like it, so she gave it to us.... Time pass, she is very independent even she is almost 70+ while I was born. She live with us when I was kid, and after we move the house out of island, she still insisting to live in that beautiful island. Her husband leave her very early, the time dad born. I have never meet grandpa, and seldom heard about him. When I gowning I was soooo busy until I forgot I have a grandma. I was study 300+ km away for my degree and due to the financial situation I seldom go back. Until I start working, what I remember was, I bought the foods and snacks she likes, that's all. I needs time to take care of her, but I never think off her time is limited. ....
Today morning, sister message me and asked me to go back visit her if is possible. I was searching for the flight and it was really cost a hand and leg. I really wanted to go back, unfortunately I'm couldn't make it. ...
Live is short and time never wait for you, thinking something still can delay, but it might not what you're expect. She is my grandma, but I seldom talks with her especially when I went to visit her, she doesn't really remember her pass that I am interested. The moment when I entered to her room, it was just lovely, my grandpa photo everywhere. She always remember my grandpa and live with his soul. More than 60 years, she never want to remarried, and still working to feed herself. I am really admire her. I like the way she is smiling, and I wish she can smile now.
Looking at 2 fishes in front of me, a male and female, swimming together for rounds, is it a hint? Any meaning? Grandpa and mama soon will be together? She is torturing at the moment, no longer can intake the foods or drink. Live with the only oxygen, and be told by doctor, her organ no longer functioning.  I asked my sister, whether she still recognize people, "she knock her head when I called her", my sister said. I might be cruel for not to visit her for last, but it is logical thinking.

29/12/2013

Human, come and go ....  It just depend on how long....
Appreciate with what you have now, and do whatever you think is good, never be regret. Never ever....

I love you mama, God bless you....

Easy Dinner

I was talking with my partner about the liver, and I was not having it for sometimes. Suddenly the idea of Liver's Night came into my brain. Went to the nearest grocery mall to hunt for liver, I am flexible, no matter from chicken, calf, or lamb, as long as is liver ... yummy. Went to bird section, can't find; beef and lamb section, can't find; non-halal section, also not available. I was kinda disappointed, but I saw the fish (Shark). I grab the fish and chicken breast, and think how to make it on the way back. I like fast yet healthy meal, so fry is the best option for those who has no oven like me ;)

What you need to do:
1) Add about a table spoon of Grapeseed Oil, and wash the fish and put in frying pan.
2) While the fish is frying, wash the asparagus, cut it and put it beside the fish.
3) Clean the Chicken Breast and pound it so that you can wrap the cheese and secure with toothpick (I was using Mozzarella instead of Swiss Cheese).
4) Crack an egg and pour some old fashion oat in plate, dip the chicken into the egg and even the oat.
5) Take out the asparagus, and fry the chicken.

Once the Fish and Chicken became golden color, your dinner is ready ;)

It is fry, but with good fat, you can use Olive Oil/ Coconut Oil instead of Grapeseed Oil. Fish are low in calories and yet high in protein as chicken breast. So, what is better than these ingredient?

Fear to Change???

Are you the one? We always feel comfortable with where we are and what we have. But, are you satisfied with your current situation? Many people surrounding me reject to change by giving me lots of excuses, "No, my partner is here, and I can't change the job in other location.", "Yea, this idea is good, but not for this moment.", "I'm hopeful it will become better." ...

Are those excuses valid? One week, one month, years pass... and they are still stand at the same place. Complaining the environment, rules & regulation, employers, economy, these and that. Afraid to go out of your comfort zone and you will never be changed/ improved. I born in Asia and still living here, adults routine are going to work early in the morning, stuck in traffic jam and fret when they knock off, having dinner either outside or homemade dinner, watching movies and sleep. Get up early in the morning, start this routine until weekend/ off day, and window shopping, shopping, theater, having lunch/ dinner in restaurant, go back watch movies and sleep. Majority of people will live this way especially Asian (which those I knew). They will never improve themselves by looking at the purpose in their live, rat race is the only words can describe them.

There is nothing wrong to live in rat race. Many people telling me they are happy and satisfied with their current life, earn just enough money and do a little saving, paid for car loan, house loan, swipe the credit card emotionally, and they are really satisfied. I am just wonder, would they be regret when they are 60-70 years old. To be honest, majority of those 'satisfied' with their life might just follow whatever 'the crowd' said. Pay attention, they are struggling with their current income, others than pay back those debt and little saving, they can't do the extra things. Why don't they change? Change a job? Change the environment? Change the mindset? Change to be business owner or investor?

Invest time in studying yet getting the knowledge of  world or just the country economies rather than those drama, isn't worth? Read some self-help books or be active after working hours isn't fun then sitting on couch and watching movie? Go for outdoor activities (mountain climbing, cycling, jogging, BBQ...) or indoor (sauna, tennis, squash, bowling...) rather than shopping shopping shopping, isn't fun? To me, sometimes I'm wondering I'm like a alien or my friends and family are normal, our life style totally different. And thank god, at least my love partner same like me ;) 

 Don't be afraid to change!!! I changed a lots  so far, and is good but still not perfect. I was living in country that are really suck. No security, inflation, bias government, lousy transportation services, high percentage of low literacy that lead to no culture environment (no defense, I admit is not all, but majority) and so on. Once I graduate, I was struggling in this situation. As a Degree Holder, your paid will be 1,600-2,000, and if you have no transport, about 170 for public transportation, rent a room for 500-800, it just normal food will cause you 600, how about living expenses, girls for beauty, guys for gaming?? You might have a question, "Is't really so bad? If so, how the rest able to survive?" Yes, with lots of debt of credit card, and loan. 

I'm living in Singapore, and you can survive with the income as the inflation rate is low and the expenses are reasonable. It is one of the Changes I made, and I'm really appreciate the encouragement from my love partner. I have no one in Singapore and I came here alone with few interview appointments. Living in capsule and backpacker to reduce the cost, thank to the convenient transportation here. I found a job, and found a room through the research I did. 

My first job here was my interested job, but I quit after 3 weeks since I realized I was abused by the employer. I was fed up of the behaviour and promises made by the employer, quit without having any back up. I went back to my country and my only one keep pushing me to find another new job. And after about a month, I found it. The salary I got was 300 more than the previous job. I worked for about 4 months and again I quit. You must think I'm a vase and can't tolerate the 'real society'. I am not! When I interview for this job, the owner told me, second floor got about 10 plus colleague, and explain my job scope. I was really happy for the new environment. 

The very first day, I was wearing very formal and enter to the office, waiting for my colleague. And I was be told by the person who I'm going to replace, "I am the only one in this room, and you are going to replace me, other than that we have an owner and owner's wife." I was really shock, but still telling myself to calm down and try to stay positive. When I was alone in office, I was everything, I need to answer phone call, handle suppliers, customers, delivery team, logistic, account (company is having the debt since 2011, and I have to always lie to people my owner oversea, or this and that), and the other branch which managed by the owner's parents (75-85 years old). The phone start ringing early morning and I'm the one will be get scolded due to the debt company owe. Lack of good communication from both owners also cause lots of unnecessary problem that I need to overtime with no single penny. I was telling my self I need to stay for at least a year, and see what is going on. Many suppliers talked to me the 'history' of this company, people won't work for long time due to the stingy owner. I want to prove them they are wrong, becoz I am strong enough. 

Day by day, I was nervous compared with yesterday. Sometimes even cry in office, having conflict with my love one, coz he is the only one I can talk, complaint. I quit finally after about 4 months. Other than my career, my land lady also has psychic problem as I described in Meaning of Live. So, I made a decision to change. And I did. Currently I am having a good job with better pay, and my salary was 500 more than the previous job. And right now am living in condo with high educated people and expatriate, great facilities that I can spend my leisure time. Why I live better comparing with 8 months ago? I CHANGED, and I deserved. How about you?

* Welcome for your own opinion, please comment and follow me if you like my blog.
   Appreciate. 

Lor Mee (鹵麵)

槟城鹵麵，我的最爱！！老爸时常带我们到附近餐厅享受鹵麵或虾面，同时也来个红豆冰，感觉让您无法挡。。。
这相中的可口鹵麵是在新加坡乌节路所取，味道口感不错，不过还是比不上童年的槟城鹵麵。。。

Lor Mee is popular among Hokkien in both Malaysia & Singapore, and is great for those who love starchy texture like Me One great thing about this food is --- It is low in Cal, you can just eat without any worry. I love the garlic & vinegar to add in, it made the Lor Mee taste like heaven (as you can see in photo). Fish Cake, pork/chicken, half boiled eggs will be the normal ingredient you can find in this dishes. If you are the hot spicy lover, I will suggest you to add in Chili rather than sambal ... you can feel the different 

Late Night Snack

5 mins Chocolate Bread Pudding
What to crave late at night? It was always my question. Snacks that are healthy, low carb, low in sugar and high in protein --- Chocolate Bread Pudding (CBP) ;) Don't worry, you won't gain weight with this snack at night.

This simple CBP made by whole grain bread, natural peanut butter, eggs, whey powder, milk, cinnamon, and dark coaco powder, and No Sugar Needed. Replace your white bread with wholemeal/ whole grain bread start from today you will definitely see the changes of the size of your waist. Whole grain contain higher fiber compare with white bread, more fiber means better digestion that will work on you, add few more bucks to gain the healthy body really worth worthy. 

So, how to make this fantastic looks yet delicious CBP?  Spread the Natural Peanut Butter on your whole grain bread, and cut it into cube shape. The purpose of this step is to cover your mug with this peanut butter bread, so that you can eliminate the oil (it won't stick while done). Whisk one egg (remove the yolk if you want) in a bowl, dark coaco powder, whey powder and add a little of cinnamon to boost the metabolism. After well mix pour it into the mug the well cover by whole grain bread, add on some milk for taste, and put it into microwave. Set it for 2-3 min and check it after 2-3 min (different microwave needed different timing), is done if your CBP bulk up, otherwise add 1 more min and check it until it bulk up. Bring the mug out from microwave once it done (becaful of the heat), you can eat it directly or pour it on a nice plate like i do, add on self-made dark coaco syrup and cinnamon if you want to have a better looks and taste.

I love to make my simple coaco syrup, what you need is the dark coaco powder, milk powder and boiling water. You can prepare it lesser than 2 min, and the taste of thick coaco will remain on your bug till tomorrow morning. ;) Enjoy. 

Dessert Idea --- Pumpkin Soup

Pumpkin soup this idea came into my brain for few days. Finally, I went to got it yesterday. With lesser than half of the squash you can turn out a big bowl of  this Pumpkin Soup ;)  

The ingredient I used was super basic: Lesser than half Fresh Squash, Carrot, Onion, and Chicken Powder. It can be done in 20 min time, super easy and super fast.

Pumpkin is full of Vitamin A, C , antioxidant, fruits enzymes, alpha hydroxy acids, and rich in fiber. Constipation can be cured by this high fiber squash. And do you know this little squash able to bring down the risk of lung cancer especially to those smokers. Is your husband or your father(or any friends/ family member) is a smoker? This soup is great for them, having it twice a week and stay a healthy life. :)

Besides eating it, this squash can be used as Facial Mask & Hair Mask due to the fiber and natural ingredient. It's something that I haven't try out, but will be ;).

Just few steps, you can enjoy this Squash Soup in 20min:

1) Chop the onion, cute the Squash and Carrot into cube shape.

2) Boil the Pumpkin and Carrot.

3) Fried a little of the onion with olive oil, Need Not let the onion turn into golden color, 2 minutes will do.  

4) Add in the soft Pumpkin and Carrot into the onion, and add in the chicken powder with the gravy of the pumpkin and carrot.

5) Stir it for about 3 minutes, and it cool down.

6) Blend it and serve it ;)

What is the meaning of Life???

Have you ever thought what Life is?

Feedback your parent? Achieve your New Year's Plan? Establish a family? Helping people? Self-improvement?? What's your?

Life is really wonderful If you know the meaning of it. 
Some people preferred to have a routine life: Get up and rush to work, work hard, work hard & work hard, back home have dinner and a movie, or sometime chit chatting with buddy and sleep.  
Some people spend their leisure time in Pub, Disco, Social Network to so call increase the social network.
Some people spend in gym, kick their ass to have an attractive body and enjoy their healthy meal.
People are passing their life everyday, do they know their exact direction?


Couple days ago, I was talking with a nice lady who is about seventieth. Working days and night at her young age, and realized the tiredness when she retire. Yes, she might has lot of saving, but, to me, I'm not preferred to accumulate all the money and enjoy it when I retire. You would never know what is going to happen tomorrow, and life is pretty short. Anyway, she is happy with her life, and God bless her.

Another woman which is a housewife, having cancer and not really convenient to walk. I used to suggest her, rather than sitting whole day in front of laptop watching movies, why don't just spend at least 15min per days to walk around, to get some fresh air, to socialize with neighborhood. She told me, she love what she is doing, which is get up early in the morning and sit down in front of laptop, watching movie till midnight.

It's life, just make sure when you're 50-year-old, you are still satisfied with your pass 50 years.

Everyone live once, do something that your friends and family will remember you even when you're gone. So ...
Sit down, and spend sometime to think about it. Where do you heading to? What is your achievement? What is the purpose? When you wanna make it? How? .....